American society is experiencing a troubling cultural shift where basic civility and decorum are being replaced by unnecessary abrasiveness and aggressive behavior, according to attorney Donniece Gooden. The phenomenon spans digital spaces, public forums, political arenas, and everyday interactions, with many people mistakenly equating rudeness with strength and conviction.
Gooden, a practicing attorney and litigator who describes herself as "no snowflake" and "not easily intimidated," expressed concern about the "utter lack of class and decorum that is on the rise." She observed that some individuals now behave "as if they are the beasts of the Serengeti, prioritizing loud, rude, and frankly obnoxious behavior" in social and professional settings.
The attorney recounted a recent incident at her regular coffee shop where she witnessed staff members aggressively berating a customer with food allergies who was attempting to specify modifications to her order. What began as curt responses escalated into yelling, cursing, and demands that the customer leave the establishment. The situation culminated with one staff member dramatically jumping over the counter before both Gooden and the targeted customer departed.
Gooden challenges the widespread misconception that rudeness demonstrates strength, arguing instead that "true strength—the kind born of deep self-respect, conviction, and courage—is quiet and unwavering." She contends that unnecessary hostility often serves as "a preemptive shield, thrown up by those who fear honest engagement, self-doubt, or being genuinely seen." The attorney maintains that people with genuine inner strength understand that being rude for rudeness's sake is counterproductive and unnecessary.
The decline in civil behavior has significant implications for social cohesion and professional environments. Gooden suggests that technology and social media have severely impacted how people engage with one another on a fundamental human level, contributing to this behavioral decay. As interactions become increasingly digital and detached, the normalization of aggressive communication styles threatens to erode the basic social contract that enables functional communities and workplaces.
For those concerned about this cultural trend, Gooden advocates becoming a "consistent counter-force" by maintaining personal standards of grace, integrity, and self-control. She defines class not as wealth or status but as "an inherent quality of grace, integrity, and self-control" that involves choosing "composure over chaos, thoughtfulness over impulse, and respect over retaliation." Engaging with rude individuals on their level, she warns, only validates their behavior and risks pulling observers "out of character."
The attorney's perspective is informed by her background growing up in Gary, Indiana, and Norfolk, Virginia, experiences she says ground her standards "not on privilege but on principle." She emphasizes that while everyone has difficult days, maintaining basic decency remains crucial for functional social interactions. More information about her legal practice can be found at https://www.hierophantlaw.com.
This examination of declining civility comes at a time when many Americans report increased stress about social interactions and workplace dynamics. The normalization of aggressive behavior has potential consequences for mental health, workplace productivity, and community trust. Gooden's call for a return to basic decency reflects growing concern among professionals about the social costs of increasingly hostile public discourse and interpersonal interactions.
